oh shuckledoodle my hopes of joining Jazz as keyboardist totally burst like 5 mins ago cause i read of the piano-god jon shin's blog that:
[quote] It's settled, I'm joining jazz for sure. [/quote]

FFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.
i can't join as vocalist cause i know there are so many other better singers than me in my batch. actually there's a SHIT LOAD of good singers in my batch, and i'm not included in this elite faction D:

nothing seems to be going right for me recently i guess, maybe i've been too lazy for my own good.
most of everyone i know are either involved in something during the hols or getting ready to be involved in something, and unfortunately once again i'm not included in this group of people. for example boontiong and shaochun are already in china on exchange program of sorts, almost everybody i know has a hol-job (something like a blo.... ok never mind), and if not they're already getting ready for JC life and are enriching themselves. somehow i seem to be the only lazy fucker and it kinda pisses me off.

but despite that i still can' bring myself to smack my lazy ass and get going to do something. i don't know what i should be doing though, anyone got any ideas D:

so far it's only been going to chorale practice for me, i'm not saying it's not fun or anything, but i still don't see that as something i would title "enriching" or "useful" or "boast-worthy" etc.

I NEED SOMEONE TO HELP MOTIVATE ME OR ACCOMPANY ME TO DO SOMETHING USEFUL THIS HOLS. IT'S THE ONLY FUCKING HOLIDAY I HAVE WITHOUT SOMETHING TO DO OR A GOAL TO REACH AND IT'S PISSING ME OFF.

that said i realise that every time i have something large on during the hols is related to choir, and it's not like it's a choice i have made with my heart ready to put my full dedication into beforehand. like going for trip i'll admit i always sign up telling myself that it'd be fun. only until the intensive practices start do i work real hard. i really need to change my lazy attitude.